Gospel Centered Family

Helping families and churches share Jesus with the next generation.

What Relentless Parenting Looks Like

Pat AldridgeComment

I've appreciated the ministry of Brian Hayes since the first time I heard him speak at the D6 conference. His writing has challenged me both professionally and personally. When I saw that he and wife Angela had a new book coming out entitled Relentless Parenting, I was excited to dig into it. I was even more excited when the publisher, Randall House, sent me a free copy. Here's what Brian and Angela Haynes call "relentless parenting":

"Relentless parenting utilizes time as a resource to invest." (pg. 41)

"It is in this time that parents need to be relentless about investing time for spiritual formation. By way of review, this works and we are tempted to say only works, in the context of heart connection." (pg. 46)

"A relentless parent will rearrange life priorities to be present during the teenaged years to take advantage of just such moments." (pg. 47)

"Relentless parents engage moments of pain, hurt, or fear with intercession." (pg. 49)

"... relentless parents continue to lead, yeah require, their teenager to gather with the family and the church on Sunday morning in honor of Jesus." (pg. 51)

"They have unanswered questions, blanks that need to filled in, that will either be answered by peers, other influencers, experimentation, or by relentless parents." (pg. 54)

"Relentless parents lean in ... not to control but to shape and to guard very impressionable hearts." (pg. 65)

"... relentless parenting in the area of dating relationships is critical."

"Relentless parenting avoid character assault by the use of 'you' in discipline situations." (pg. 84)

"Relentless parenting requires wisdom with our words." (pg. 85)

"Be a relentless parent - not from a need to correct, stemming form pride, but from a desire to understand your teen and lead him in the way he should go. Learn to listen and you will have your teen's heart." (pg. 101)

"More than ever before identity is an issue requiring guidance. Parents play a key part in establishing identity in the life of their child. Durning the teen years the role changes a bit by relentless parents understand it is not less intentional." (pg. 103)

"As they are asking the questions 'Who am I?' and 'Who am I supposed to be?' in their search for identity, then relentless parents should constantly reform the questions to 'Whose am I?' and 'What has He designed me to become?' " (pg. 105)

"Relentless parents go back to the beginning and demonstrate the exciting truth that God has created people intentionally and for a purpose." (pg. 106)

"Relentless parenting involves helping them identify and exercise these gifts as they become a person of influence on their way to adulthood." (pg. 108)

"Hopefully as you finish this book  you are simply thinking to yourself, 'I need to pursue my teenager's heart, relentlessly.' That requires a normal and consistent demonstration of love no matter the circumstances." (pg. 117)

"The important concept for us to recognize as relentless parents is that sin is transferable from one generation to the next." (pg. 124)

"... we must fight relentlessly for the spiritual freedom of our teenager." (pg. 129)

"Finding freedom to parent relentlessly is worth it." (pg. 131)

"Relentless parenting is based on a core value relentless love. The kind of love that never stops, never wavers, never is cut off." (pg. 133)

"Relentless parenting is pursuing the heart of your teenager even when he decides he will not demonstrate love in return. It is an unrelenting pursuit, but is healthy, not stifling. Relentless parents is codependent or controlling." (pg. 133)

"To love and parent relentlessly requires wisdom and grace that only come from God." (pg. 133)

"Relentless parenting means instantly abiding in Christ." (pg. 134)

"Every day is important in this journey. Most days in your life are ordinary, normal, and even mundane to a degree. It is precisely in the typical days of life that we do our best relentless parenting." (pg. 134)

"Every day in the ordinary moments, we are are relentless." (pg. 134)

Parents, get this book and put it into practice. Pastors, recommend this book to parents of teens. Be as relentless toward your teen as God is towards you.